When I am a Highway Cop
When I am a highway cop, I will be a different kind of highway cop. When I pull people over for speeding on the highway, I will be more mean or more chill depending on what kind of music they are listening to. Excuse me lady is that a Justin Biever CD? Yes it is. You go to jail now. Okay, haha. Excuse me man are you listening to Foo Fighters? Alright you are. Nothing wrong here, just checking. Rock on and have a good one.
- MAN: Well Jeff, I must say, your resume and past experience is very impressive indeed. But the same can be said for everyone who's interviewing for this position We only want the best and brightest on our crew Jeff, you've got to understand. Jeff. What makes you stand out from the rest of those people? What makes you tick, Jeff. What do you like to do in your spare time, for instance.
- JEFF: Well sir, sometimes I stay up late getting high and after that, when I'm getting ready for bed, I end up brushing my teeth for upwards of 20 minutes because I get so focused on my own reflection and thinking about who I am and where I'm at in my life, and if my face is getting fatter, and why don't I have a better job, and why am I single, and do I have weak enamel, and maybe it's all bullshit and I'm young and it'll all be fine. Also, I almost always leave the faucet on.
- MAN: Terrific, when can you start?